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A Woman’s Financial Responsibilities in Her Household: Part I

In Part I of A Woman’s Financial Responsibilities in Her Household, I discuss some gender generalizations regarding how money responsibilities are handled in a typical household and share with you some introspection regarding my situation during the earlier years of my marriage.

There are many aspects to personal finance and financial planning, ranging from budgeting, paying for a vacation, purchasing a home, purchasing insurances, retirement planning and estate planning. This is important to keep in mind as we discuss household financial responsibilities.

Women and Financial Responsibilities

Gender Generalizations

In most households, the typical stereotype type is that the wife is responsible for balancing the checkbook (e.g., managing the day-to-day budget) while the husband attends to bigger picture financial planning (e.g., purchasing insurances, tax planning and investing retirement funds).

Certainly, there are households where the wife doesn’t participate much in or any part of the family’s financial responsibilities. This was illustrated in a 2013 Fidelity Investments Couples Retirement Study, where two in ten women admitted to having only some or no input into the day-to-day financial decisions in their households. Then, there are households where the wife is the CFO. And in between, there are households where both the wife and husband participate equally in every aspect of the family’s financial situations.

In general, though, women still view managing and balancing the family’s checkbook and budget as a woman’s role. These women believe such responsibilities are traditionally deemed more feminine. Husbands, on the other hand, are more suited to attending to the bigger picture household financial planning, as they are being seen more technical savvy and/or have a higher risk tolerance personality.

This gender generalization around household money management is evident in the 2014-2015 Prudential study on Financial Experience & Behaviors Among Women. The study reported that women respondents ranked themselves highest on their knowledge of managing debt and managing money (about 30% gave themselves an “A”) and lowest on their knowledge about generating an income stream in retirement and investing (less than 10% gave themselves an “A” and many gave themselves “F”). Such findings certainly give some insights into what women in general value and do well at when it comes to financial responsibilities in the household.

Many of my married girlfriends recalled their mothers taking care of the family’s basic day-to-day budget. Once married, my girlfriends just automatically followed their mothers’ footstep when it came to managing finances in their own households. Yet, when it came to their household’s bigger picture financial planning, many of my girlfriends didn’t have much of a clue.

For instance, some didn’t know all the various liabilities they have, some didn’t know all the different retirement accounts their husbands have, some didn’t know if their husbands received stock options as part of the compensation package, some didn’t know how much their husbands were putting into their deferred tax accounts, some didn’t know what their car and/or home insurances covered (or would not cover), some didn’t know if their husbands had disability insurance, some didn’t know how many brokerage accounts they had, many didn’t know what universal liability insurance is, and the list went on and on. Their husbands were taking care of those responsibilities and didn’t always involve their wives in the process, either consciously or subconsciously.

Throughout those conversations and discoveries many of my girlfriends expressed a lack of time to spend on long-term financial planning. I could relate in many ways. Like my girlfriends, I was happy filling my day with work, childcare, household chores and exercises. I enjoyed spending time planning social events for myself and my family. I took pride in doing interior decorating, planning for holiday gatherings and shopping for the lowest bargains (extremely time consuming).

When would I have had the time to learn about investing in the stock market, keep track of my family’s investment portfolio performance, peruse through the IRS website to reduce family income tax, learn to calculate how much life and/or disability insurance my family needs, or work on estate planning with my husband?

I’m sure if my life situation forced me to I would have done all that and perhaps more, however, my husband was taking care of all those financial responsibilities so that I didn’t have to. We were each great and efficient at what we “owned”. That was the whole idea behind the concept, division of labor, right? At least I thought so.

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Transformative Moment: Pursuing Financial Clarity, Financial Wisdom and Financial Confidence

My Transformative Moment

When was the last time you watched/read/heard something that instantaneously motivated you to radically change the way you live your life? This happened to me about three moments ago (June 2016) while doing some background research on the Internet for a project. I came upon statistics after statistics that basically summed up to the following:

“…two out of every three women say that they feel they have little knowledge of financial products and services.  These women are less able to plan for retirement, less able to save for their children’s education, and are more likely to fall victim to deceptive, abusive, or predatory financial practices.” 

“…As many as 8 in 10 [of women], according to Fidelity’s 2015 Money Fit Women study—hold back when it’s time to discuss money with friends and family. Many also feel uneasy or lack confidence when it comes to making big financial decisions, with about 50% admitting they are often nervous about the financial choices they make.”

“Even though many women can understand the headlines of financial news and talk stocks at a dinner party, they’re really not fluent on these topics, and they feel uneducated, disempowered and in a complete fog when it comes to their own relationship with money,” Ms. Birgbauer said.   Many women simply don’t know what questions to ask or where to begin.”

“…less than half of respondents [both men and women study participants] correctly answered the question about interest rates and inflation and only one-third were able to correctly answer all three questions…while 55% of men correctly answered the two questions about interest rates and inflation, only 38% of women did so. Moreover, while 38% of men correctly answered all three questions, only 22% of women did so…Women are much more likely than men to indicate that they do not know the answer to the questions. The proportion of “do not know” responses was particularly high on the risk diversification question; as many as 41% of women indicated that they did not know whether a single company stock is riskier than a stock mutual fund. Moreover, half of women gave at least one “do not know” response to the three financial literacy questions. Very similar differences in financial literacy between men and women have been found in the Netherlands, Germany, Sweden, New Zealand, Italy, Japan, Australia, France, and Switzerland”. Read more about the research here

Ms. Financial Literacy transformative moment

The statistics were so novel, yet shockingly alarming to me and stirred up unsettling emotions from within. I felt this strong need to literally rewrite those numbers and statements that appeared in the articles. Prior to that moment I was simply oblivious about research on women and financial literacy and women’s financial well-being. I had read that women get less pay than men, but I didn’t feel the urge to bring about social change; yet, for some reason, at that particular moment I took matter to a much more personal level as I was staring at those articles. Those numbers and statements touched something deep inside me, and I felt uncomfortable and vulnerable. I also sensed this urgency to take action and not have myself fit into any of those statistics and statements aforementioned (At the time my husband was managing most of the family’s finances. What happens if my family’s situation changes?). From that moment on I became personally invested fighting those stereotypes, hoping to steer the statistics and statements about women toward a much more positive light in the near future.

For the first time in my life I have a cause to fight for. I’m not a certified financial planner/advisor nor a certified financial analyst nor an economist nor a CPA nor an accountant. I’m not a finance professional through formal education. I’m a woman who believes and takes pride in a sense of freedom, satisfaction, fulfillment and empowerment that I get from being financially competent and being conscious managing my family’s money. Continue Reading

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